"I don't believe it!" Christian cried, scowling at the tile of the bathroom wall. The phone was ringing. He had just settled into the nice hot bath he had drawn himself, and just as he got comfortable, the phone had rung. "Bloody awful thing, " he muttered, hauling his heavy body out of the tub and stomping, naked, out of the bathroom and into his bedroom, which contained the nearest phone.
He took a deep breath, telling himself it could be Edge, then picked up the phone, saying in a polite, playful voice, "Hello?"
Christian pouted, wishing it was Edge on the phone. He missed his lover terribly, and could never seen to talk to him enough when he was away. He trudged back into the bathroom, glad that the phone was portable, and wishing he had just brought it with him in the first place. "And this is?" he demanded as he settled back into the tub.
"Gunn, right?" Christian prayed it was that Billy, the good Billy, rather than the fruitloop that was known as Billy Kidman. Kidman was current out on "injury", the injury being a swollen belly courtesy of either a McMahon or Helmsley; the boys in back had yet to figure out the exact culprit. Christian resolved to drown his rubber ducky if someone had given Kidman his home phone number.
"Yep. Billy Gunn."
"Whatcha want?" Christian questioned, smiling as he relaxed in the hot bath, slipping one hand under the water and resting it on his rounded abdomen.
"Actually, I was hoping we could spend some time together," Billy suggested.
"Why, are you injured or something?" Christian questioned.
"Um, well not exactly." Billy cleared his throat. "I haven't exactly told anyone this yet, well, except Chuck, of course, and Rico, 'cos he's my best friend, but I'm kind of expecting."
"No kidding!" Christian grinned. "Billy, that's awesome! Congratuations!"
"Thanks. I'm excited. So, do you think maybe we could hang out? Pregnant man to pregnant man?"
"Heck yeah!" Christian exclaimed, flushing with excitement. "That would totally rule! I've been sooooo bored these past few months, I would LOVE to have a buddy to hang with! And hey, do you have a vibrator?"
"Uh...what?" Billy sounded confused.
"Well, I figure Edge and Chuck wouldn't mind if we, you know, helped each other out a bit, right?" Christian chuckled. "I just get SO cock starved when Edge is away, but I have trouble reaching when I'm using a vibrator or a dildo, and it's just never satisfying! But I just prefer to masturbate when I have something inside me, it just doesn't do it for me without some kind of stimulation up there. I figure you could work the vibrator for me, and I'll do it for you! We won't be touching or anything, so it shouldn't make our men jealous."
"Uh...you do that while you're pregnant?" Billy sounded a little unsure.
"Duh! Maybe it hasn't hit you yet, baby, but if you're anything like me, the more pregnant you get, the more you lust for cock!" Christian told the other man. "I've never in my life wanted it as bad as I do now. Whenever Edge is home, I'm begging him to have sex like every 5 minutes."
"Hmm. Well I honestly don't think Chuck would mind that, he wants to put it in me more than I want to take it." Billy laughed nervously. "I don't know about...what you suggested, though. I've never done anything like that."
Christian raised an eyebrow, his voice conveying the meaning. "You've never used a vibrator?"
"Well....Chuck talked me into doing it wasn't. But I wasn't really comfortable with it."
"Don't worry, hon, we'll ease you in." Chrisitan chuckled again. "I haven't put you off hanging out with me, have I?"
"No. No I still want to. I don't think I want to be on my own during this. And if Chuck and Edge think it's ok, maybe I'll try that vibrator thing."
"Sweet." Christian stuck his toes out of the hot water, wiggling them and watching with an amused smile as he talked to Billy. "You wanna actually stay here, or just come over to hang out sometimes? I can prepare a room for you, I got nothin' else to do."
"Well, I only live about 15 minutes away, so I guess I'll probably just come over during the day sometimes. But if you have a guest room I can stay in sometimes, that would be nice," Billy replied.
"Yep, we do!" Christian exclaimed. "I'll make sure it's usable. But you won't be bothered if you're here and Edge comes home and we wanna have sex, right?"
"Uh, well, no, I guess not," Billy replied. "You're not exactly shy, are you Christian?"
"Never been called shy in my life," Christian confirmed, wiggling his toes some more. "Besides, I know you. You're a good guy, and you're knocked up like me, so I feel extra close to you! We can go through this wonderful joy of life together!" He snorted, his words sarcastic, but playfully so.
"It will be nice to have someone to help me through this," Billy replied. "Much as I love him, I think Chuck's going to be absolutely useless through my pregnancy. Rico did promise to come see me and take care of me every time he can, though, and I know he'll be good at it. He's already talking about having babies with Jeff, and they've only been together 4 months!"
"Can you believe those two are a couple?" Christian chuckled. "I never would've thought of them together, but I guess it's that whole 'opposites attract' thing."
"It must be. He seems really happy with Jeff though, and Jeff seems happy too, so I'm not gonna argue. But can you imagine what their babies are gonna look like?"
"Green-haired imps with sideburns?" Christian snickered.
"Probably. And their kids'll probably have the most demented style! Can you imagine a combination of Rico and Jeff's wardrobes?"
"Do I want to?" Christian shook his head. "But, anyway, when you coming home to serve your term?"
"Next week," Billy replied. "They've gotta do an injury angle first to explain me being out."
"Ah, the good old injury angle. Aka getting thrown around like a rag doll and probably smacked with something hard," Christian stated knowingly.
"Yep. But Chuck was adamant that it be done in a way that puts the baby at the least risk, so I'm not worried."
"I'm sure you'll be fine. And once you get here, we are gonna have a ton of fun!" Christian exclaimed. "Oooh, I can't wait!"
"Me either. I'm just glad you want to hang with me, I was scared I was gonna be stuck at home with nothing to do but go crazy," Billy joked.
"Don't you worry, Bill, I'll keep your life VERY interesting!" Christian promised, squealing as he heard a beep through the phone. "Oooh, that's the call waiting! I bet it's Edge! I'll talk to you later, ok Billy?"
"Yep. Chuck's calling for me anyway. Later!"
"Bye." Christian quickly flipped over to the other call. "Hello?" he said in a silky, seductive voice.
"Edge!" Christian squealed happily. "Baby, I haven't from you forever!"
"I talked to you this morning!" Edge exclaimed.
"Well, seems like forever," Christian pouted. "Guess what guess what?"
"What?" Edge questioned.
"Billy's pregnant!" Christian gushed. "Chuck's knocked him up, and he lives close by, so he's totally gonna hang with me and we're gonna keep each other from going crazy! It's that awesome?"
"That is great!" Edge agreed. "I'm glad you'll have a friend with you. You know I hate leaving you, baby, but I just can't take 9 months off from my career."
"I know. I understand." Christian let himself sink down into the hot bath water, stopping himself just before the phone went under. "Talk dirty to me, baby."
Edge sighed. "Well my pretty baby ever think about anything but sex again?" he mourned playfully.
"Maybe. But not right now. I'm in a hot bath, Edge, and I'm naked," Christian purred.
"Mmmhmm." Christian smiled to himself, knowing from the tone of Edge's voice that, this time at least, he had won.
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