Side Benefits, The Best
Rating: R
Content: m/m slash, language, sweetness
Characters: Edge & Christian
Summery: A proper return takes place after a botched one
SPOILERS: ECW 2/10/09
Author’s Note: I could rant until I’m blue in the face about what a huge opportunity WWE missed, about how they ruined what should have been a huge moment, about how they put my boy up against the most useless POS ever to be signed…but I decided to fic it instead. Excuse me for being immature for a moment, but, *sends a certain finger WWE’s way*
Written 2/10/09



“Dear GOD!” Edge collapsed onto the bedspread, completely out of breath. “That has to be the most fucking violent sex we’ve ever had.”

“Sorry,” Christian panted, putting a hand to his chest as he tried to regain his breath.

“Don’t apologize.” Edge closed his eyes as he felt his heart rate gradually beginning to calm down. “It was amazing.

“At least something good can come out of this shit,” Christian muttered, a scowl taking over this face. “At least me being back means I can be with you.” He sighed, rolling over and resting his head on his lover’s still rapidly heaving chest. “I am such an idiot. Why did I think it’d be different? It’s just gotten fucking worse. TNA’s pretty fucking awful, but that had to be the worst match of my career. I thought nothing could be worse than carrying around Jarrett’s little divas!” He sighed deeply. “I’m still fucking pissed off.”

“If only fucking would solve that.” Edge wrapped his arms protectively around his lover. “If it makes you feel any better, pretty much every job in the world is about trying to live with clueless asshole management.”

Christian shook his head, nuzzling his nose against his lover’s chest. “Thank god I have you, baby,” he muttered. “I guess it’s back to holding my nose and doing what I’m assigned. Least I got a few months off. And they’re doing pretty good things with you, that’s an improvement.”

“Well I am 6’4”, I make the minimum requirement for management favor.” Edge rolled his eyes. He smiled a bit, purposefully changing the subject. “Baby, remember when we thought about getting therapy to deal with being apart?”

“Yeah.” Christian raised his head, looking curiously at his lover. “What about it?”

“I had the weirdest dream about it the other night,” Edge told him. “I dreamt that since it was couples therapy, we had a couple as our therapists, and it was Punk and Elijah. They were wearing these schoolgirl/sexy business woman outfits and had those ‘secretly pretty librarian’ glasses on. And for therapy, all we did was take turns making out.”

“Really?” Christian was distracted enough to be amused. “Like in a circle, and we all switched off?”

“No.” Edge chuckled, ruffling his hair. “I mean, Punk and Lij would make out, then you and I would make out. It was supposed to be very therapeutic.”

“Sex can be therapeutic,” Christian observed. “Tonight definitely shows that. I don’t know about the whole making out thing, though. Maybe we should try it next time we have Punk and Lij over.”

“They’re our friends!” Edge exclaimed.

“Yeah, well.” Christian laid his head back down, his mouth quirking in a smirk. “Not like we haven’t had fun with our friends before. We’ve laid some pretty fucking hot guys.”

“Yeah.” Edge nodded in agreement, his hands moving to massage Christian’s lower back. “Good thing there are so many kinds of sex, so we can have fun with other guys, and still have things just for you and I.”

“Mmmhmm.” Christian was grinning into Edge’s chest. “I love that you’re the only man who’s ever been inside me.”

“Ditto.” Edge chuckled, his fingers tiptoeing up Christian’s bare back. “I still remember the look on Kurt’s face, way back in 2000, when he found out we reserve that for each other.”

“Yeah. We had some damn good frot with him, though.” Christian sighed, his arms wrapping possessively around his lover. “I’m glad I’m back, so I can kick the ass of anyone who tries to hit on you.”

Edge laughed out loud. “You’ll be fighting all day, baby. I swear, I get more offers that John Morrison. Which is really saying something, because he’s got abs you could grate cheese on.”

“Can’t compare to you,” Christian murmured, rubbing his face between Edge’s pecs. “Fuck, you’ve got an awesome body. And I love how you’re growing your hair longer again. Thank GOD you shaved that fucking awful beard.”

Edge clicked his tongue. “Can’t you leave it with the compliment?” He let his hand sneak down between them, caressing Christian’s chest. “I’m not the one who’s been experimenting with chest hair.”

“It’s manly. Besides, I got AJ to do it. Looks good on a sweet baby face like him.”

“Mmmm.” Edge summoned the strength to roll his lover over, capturing Christian in a searing kiss. Christian’s arms wound automatically around his neck, the smaller blonde eagerly returning his kisses.

“Feeling a second wind?” Christian whispered, his lips moving only a centimeter away from Edge’s.

“Second?” Edge quirked an eyebrow. “Are you serious?”

Christian chuckled. “What, is it more than that?”

“Coy bitch.” Edge stole another kiss, groaning as the friction between their bodies began to inspire him. “I LOVE having you back,” he whispered. “Been way too fucking long.”

“Thank god I have you to take the taste out of my mouth.” Edge kissed him before he could start to scowl again.

It might not have been a glorious reunion on tv, but in bed, the two bombshells were once again fully united.



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