Stress Reliever
Content: m/m slash, language
Rating: R
Characters: CM Punk, Cryme Tyme (Shad & JTG), mention of Elijah Burke
Summery: When Punk is in dire need of some relaxation, WWE’s favorite entrepreneurs are there to help
Written 1/27/09



“God FUCKING dammit!”

Punk charged into the locker room, tripping over an empty bucket on the floor and kicking it with such force that it cracked as it smashed into the wall.

Punk’s face was red, his knuckles clenched and white. “Where’s your fucking boyfriend to fuck your ass when you REALLY FUCKING NEED a stress relief?!?” he hollered.

Cryme Tyme, who happened to witness his outburst, exchanged a quick look, then plastered smiles on their faces, standing and approaching the raging superstar.

“CM,” Shad began, “we happened to notice that you’re in need of the services of a fine black man.”

“And your boyfriend is fine,” JTG affirmed. “But today is your lucky day, because Cryme Tyme is here for you.” He cocked the cap which was sitting on his head, striking a pose and flexing his arm muscle.

Punk took a deep breath, still looking pissed, but also looking confused, and a bit wary.

Shad and JTG glanced at each other, Shad quickly adding, “And since we know you have fine taste, as a white gentleman with a black man, we’re willing to offer you our best value yet, a 2 for 1 special.”

“Guys.” Punk took a deep breath, shaking his head. “I appreciate you wanna help, but part of what I’m so pissed about is people wanting my ass, so - ”

“Oh, we weren’t meaning to insinuate that.” JTG smiled, feigning innocence.

“We just meant,” Shad took over, “that Cryme Tyme specializes in helping gentlemen like yourself relax, after a long hard day at work.”

“Do you?” Punk still looked wary, but he was listening.

“It’s our favorite line of work,” JTG told him. “Big Shad here – he gives awesome back rubs. And back at our hotel room, we got one of those bubbling foot baths to sooth tired feet. We got nice lotion, and massage oil, and chocolate.”

“The finest crafted German chocolate truffles, guaranteed to please the taste buds,” Shad put in.

Punk licked his lips at the mention of chocolate, his favorite indulgence, after Elijah. “And you’re not just trying to get my ass, like that douche bag Jericho?” he demanded.

“No sir.” JTG put a hand to his chest. “We are perfect gentlemen. We know you’re dating a brother, and we respect that.”

“Well…” Punk chewed his lip, looking thoughtful. “How much might an evening like this cost me?”

“I think we can make a reasonable suggestion.” Shad pulled out a little pad, writing a number on it and handing it to Punk.

Punk glanced at it, chewing his lip as he considered.

“And we guarantee,” JTG quickly added, “that you will come out of this evening feeling relaxed, and refreshed. Best thing next to a night at home with your man.”

“I do fucking need to relax.” Punk drew a ragged breath. “I am so tired of fighting that fucker, week after week after week! I’m sick of carrying his worthless ass, I’m sick of him fucking sexually harassing me, and I’m sick of being on the road without my man because the fucker got him fired! As if getting my man fired is gonna make me wanna ride your dick!” He growled, his hands clenching again.

Cryme Tyme exchanged another look. “That’s a perfect start,” Shad stated, putting an arm around Punk’s shoulders. “Vent it out, then we’ll get started on relaxing you.”

“And believe me, you will be feeling relaxed,” JTG assured him, slipping an arm around Punk’s waist.

Punk had his doubts about that, but he was willing to give it a try.

An hour later, he was singing a very different tune. He was perched on an ottoman, leaning back against big Shad as the large man massaged his chest with some deliciously scented oil. His feet were immersed in a bubbling foot bath, a first for him, and something that would definitely be repeated.

“Another chocolate?” JTG offered.

“Mmm, yes please.” Punk stretched his arms leisurely, opening his mouth for the tasty truffle. “This is great,” he murmured, loving the touch as Shad’s skilled hands worked over his shoulders. “You guys really know what you’re doing.”

“Making beautiful men like yourself happy is our pleasure,” Shad murmured, his hands sliding back down over Punk’s chest. Punk closed his eyes, enjoying the big man’s talented hands. Shad had already treated him to a full body massage, which left every part of him feeling warm and relaxed. After some coaxing and respectful assurances, he had even been convinced to shed his boxers, allowing Shad access to the entire back side of his body. He hadn’t retrieved his boxers, luxuriating in his nakedness. He wasn’t shy, at least not when he was in respectful company.

Still, his nakedness hid nothing, so he knew both members of Cryme Tyme could see his response to Shad’s soothing touches across his pecs. He was starting to think that he would like to be even more relaxed. He and Elijah were very open with each other, and he knew his man would be cool with it. Leisurely, he tilted his chin up, his hand sliding up into Shad’s braids and pulling the big man’s head down. Punk met his lips in a lazy kiss, sighing contently as Shad’s soft mouth responded to him.

His other hand grasped Shad’s palm, trailing it down his chest, past his little treasure trail, and arriving at his aroused cock. Shad smiled into their kiss, his massage-oil slick hand beginning to stroke Punk slowly. Punk groaned, his hips rocking softly into the delicious contact.

Shad moved his hand up to cup the side of Punk’s face, JTG’s palm taking its place on Punk’s shaft. He delicately worked Punk’s cock, leaning down to blow softly across the tip.

“Mmmmm,” Punk murmured, his back arching, pressing his shoulders back against Shad’s chest.

“You want..?” Shad murmured against his ear, his lips caressing Punk’s neck.

“Yeah,” Punk breathed, “Lij is cool.”

Shad grinned, his hands moving to rub Punk’s nipples as he drew him into a sweet kiss. JTG returned the grin, spreading his lips and taking Punk into the heat of his mouth. Punk’s groan inspired him to loosen his throat, taking Punk’s cock deeper. Punk’s hand came up to rest on the back of his head, providing gentle encouragement.

The scene was relaxed and drawn out. Punk enjoyed the sweet kisses he was receiving from Shad, the urgency in his groin gradually building even as his body relaxed. “Please,” he whispered, his fingers playing across JTG’s hair. JTG took his queue, his fingers coming up to stroke Punk’s balls and perineum as he took Punk’s cock deep in his throat. Punk gasped as he released into JTG’s mouth, his head pressing back into Shad’s chest.

After a final lick, JTG sat back, smiling up at the very satisfied superstar. “Can we interest you in a bath?” Shad whispered in Punk’s ear. The straight edger had gone boneless against him, so relaxed he appeared near dozing.

“Yeah,” Punk sighed. His eyes remained closed as he leaned comfortably back into Shad’s chest. “And I could use a night of cuddling.”

“We completely understand,” Shad assured him, his breath brushing across Punk’s ear. “J, can you start a bath?”

“Can do.” JTC hopped to his feet. He took a moment to gaze down at Punk’s relaxed form, grinning in pride. Then he headed off to the bathroom, starting up a nice hot bath.


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