Jay Reso. The name's been on my mind continually for the past three weeks. He's been as happy as a clam recently, and I know why. His sick little affair with his buddy, Adam Copeland. I think he's forgotten completely about the AIDS scare. Three weeks, and he's forgotten already.

 The hospital never found the culprit, of course. I do clean work. But, unfortunately, that doesn't seem to matter. Jay knows he isn't sick, which has left him free to take his relationship with Adam to the next level. Which he has.

 I figured he might find out that the test results were phony, but if he did, I had hoped he'd take the scare as a warning. He could very well find himself in that situation someday if he doesn't stop traveling the path he is. But no, he didn't get it. He doesn't understand that I did it to help him, to straighten him out.

 Fool. He can't be that stupid. No, he isn't stupid. He's blind. Blinded by Adam and all of his devilish charms. Well, I'm not giving up. Jay's a good man at heart, he's just gotten a little lost. And I think I'm just the person to help him to a better, moral life.

Part 1

 "Hey man, wait up!"

 I groan, but turn around anyway. Jeff Hardy jogs up to my side, grinning like an idiot. I really don't like him or his brother, but I'm trying to stay close to Jay until I figure out how to help him, and unfortunately he is Jay's friend.

 "Hi Jeff," I say, faking a small smile.

 "So what are you getting him?" Jeff asks, his eyes glowing.

 I furrow my brow in confusion. "What? Who?"

 "Jay, of course!" Jeff exclaims. "You didn't forget, did you?"

 I blink. "Forget what?"

 "Jay's birthday!" Jeff exclaims. "It's tomorrow! We're meeting at that club for the party, remember? Adam reserved a private room for us and all! Didn't Jay invite you?"

 My mouth falls open. How could I have forgotten? His birthday...there's got to be a way to use this to get through to him.

 Jeff giggles. "You did forget, didn't you? Gonna be doing some last minute shopping tonight?" I shrug, not liking the look on his face at all. "Can I help you?" he pleads, smiling hopefully. "I can help you get a great present! Wait ‘til you see what I got him!"

 "That's ok Jeff, I think I can handle it," I tell him.

 He raises his eyebrows. "You sure? I saw what you got Adam for his birthday."

 I grit my teeth. God, he's annoying. I've got to get away from him. "I'll be fine, thanks," I tell him, excusing myself as politely as possible. I've already purchased a few things that may lead to a much better birthday for Jay - and hopefully, stop any unsuitable activities Adam may have planned for him. Now I just have to get it in the right place...

Jay was laughing as he pushed open the door to his and Adam's hotel room. "Come on, give me a hint!" he exclaimed, holding the door for his partner.

 "Nope, no hints," Adam replied with a wicked smile. "You'll just have to wait for tomorrow!"

 Jay sighed in resignation. "Do you always have to get your way?" he complained.

 Adam laughed, wrapping his arms around Jay's waist. "If I told you, then it would completely spoil the surprise. Do you really want that?"

 "I guess not." Jay smiled happily as Adam's lips gently brushed his neck. "Mmm, but I can think of a nice little pre-birthday present you can give me," he said slyly, raising an eyebrow suggestively.

 Adam returned his grin. "I like the sound of that," he breathed, drawing Jay into a deep kiss. He backed slowly towards the room's bed, gently laying Jay down on the mattress.

 Jay squirmed uncomfortably, breaking the kiss. "Ow, ow!" he exclaimed, pulling out of Adam's arms and rolling onto a different spot on the bed. "What the heck?" He glared down at the hard object he had been lying on. "Where did this come from?"

 Adam frowned. "Well, it's not mine. What is it?"

 Jay picked up the book, a very unhappy look coming over his face as he read the title.

 "What?" Adam asked. He took the book from Jay's hands when the golden blonde didn't respond. It was called "Rehabilitation for homosexuals, for a better, healthier life." Adam's face fell, his lips forming a silent ‘Oh.' He looked up at Jay, seeing tears in the golden blonde's eyes. "Jay? Are you ok?" he asked, quickly setting the book aside.

 Jay shook his head. "Who would do this?" he whispered. "I didn't think anyone even know, besides the Hardyz and Hunter and Sean. Why would someone do this?"

 "Shh, sweetheart." Adam pulled Jay into his arms as a tear slid down his partner's face. He felt anger building inside him as Jay cried quietly. It was one thing to not like their relationship, but for someone to sneak into their hotel room and plant this book, which the culprit had known would upset them, was crossing the line. Adam scowled, feeling even more angry the more he thought about it.

Part 2

 It worked. I can tell from the looks on their faces. I knew it would stop the completely immoral activities I'm sure Adam had in store for poor Jay. Jay looks sad, but he'll be much happier after I get through to him tonight. He'll be happier because he'll know he's leading a moral life, unlike now. I'll have to stick by his side, of course, to protect him from Adam. I wouldn't want him seduced by that monster again.

 I snap out of my thoughts as I hear a voice talking to me. I blink, realizing it was Jay who spoke. "What?" I stammer, having been completely zoning out.

 "I was just wondering if you're coming to the party tonight," Jay repeats, giving me a small smile. He has a lovely smile. I'm sure it will make some lucky woman quite happy.

 I'm a little surprised at the strong stirring of emotions I feel at that thought. I push it to the back of my mind, returning his smile. "Of course I'm coming! What are friends for but to party with?"

 Jay laughs and shakes his head. "You've been listening to Jeff WAAAAY too much!"

 "What about me?" Jeff bounces up to us, looking very excited. He's not usually quite this hyper. He just loves a good party. Sometimes he gets excited about a special event a week in advance, and stays that way until a week after. If I were his brother, I'd shoot myself.

 "Jeff, everything isn't about you," Matt chastises, coming up behind his little brother.

 "Jay said my name!" Jeff exclaims. "I heard it clearly!"

 Jay chuckles and shakes his head again. "Yes Jeff, I said your name. I was just saying he's been hanging around you too much," he explains, gesturing to me. "He's starting to talk like you!"

 Matt looks appalled. "Good god, talking like Jeff? Some how, I just can't picture a guy like you using all his silly words." Matt tilts his head and looks at me contemplatively, then laughs. "Man, you need to smile more often, you know that? You always look so serious!"

 I shrug. "Sorry. If you'll excuse me, I have a match. I'll see you tonight, though."

Matt, Jeff and Jay watched as their friend walked down the hall. "You know, he's really not much fun," Jeff commented.

 "He's very nice," Jay said defensively. "Besides, we have a lot in common."

 Both Hardyz stared a him for a moment, then burst out laughing. "A lot in common? You and him?" Matt wiped at the tears in his eyes. "No offense, Jay, but I don't think so."

 The smile on Jay's face had faded, and he was staring at the floor. "Seriously, guys, I need to talk to you about something," he said very quietly.

 Matt and Jeff quickly sobered up, glancing at each other. "What?" Jeff asked. "We were just kidding, Jay."

 "I know." Jay looked around, then gestured for them to follow him into his locker room. He took a deep breath before speaking, while the Hardyz watched him intently. "As you know, not very many people know about my relationship with Adam," he said quietly. "I need to ask you guys, and please answer honestly. Do either of you - have a problem with it? I mean, think it's unhealthy or something?"

 The Hardyz stared at him. Jeff glanced at his brother, then cleared his throat and spoke. "Jay, of course we don't. I mean, I was a little surprised at first, but you're my friend. If I didn't think it was ok before, I do now, because there's certainly nothing wrong with you."

 "Absolutely," Matt agreed with conviction.

 Jay sighed and sat down on a bench, still looking upset. "I was almost hoping it was one of you," he whispered, putting his head in his heads.

 "What was?" the brothers asked in unison, making faces at each other when their words came out at the same time.

 Jay sighed again. "Last night, Adam and I found something very disturbing in our room. We were - " He cleared his throat and blushed slightly. "Well, we were about to go to bed, when we saw what was on our bed."

 "What?" the brothers asked, glaring at each other when their words again came out in unison.

 "This book." Jay reached into his bag and pulled out the offensive object, handing it to Jeff without looking at it.

 Jeff's eyes widened as he read the title, then opened the book and flipped through it. "This is by one of those psycho people that think you can change you sexual orientation," he stated, frowning. "God, someone left this in your room?"

 "Yes," Jay nodded, looking very upset.

Part 3

 "Matt!" Jeff cried as his brother snatched the book out of his hands and dropped it in the garbage.

 "That's where that kind of trash belongs!" Matt exclaimed. He sat down on the bench next to Jay and rubbed his back comfortingly. "This really upset you, didn't it?"

 Jay sighed and nodded. "What really disturbs me about it," he stated, "is that this means someone else knows. Unless it was Sean or Hunter, and I really doubt that."

 "Who could know?" Jeff wondered. "I haven't told anyone. I swear."

 "Me neither," Matt put in.

 "I'll have to ask Sean and Hunter, but I doubt they have." Jay sighed again. "You know, I was in such a good mood last night! And today being my birthday and all...why did it have to be today? This is supposed to be a good day!" Jay complained.

 "Don't worry, Jay," Jeff said with a grin. "It'll end up being a great day! We're throwing one hell of a party tonight, you know. I helped set it all up. It's gonna kick ass! You're gonna have a great time."

 Jay smiled wanly. "I certainly hope so. Well, thanks guys. I'm glad it's not you."

 "No prob," Jeff said as he and Matt headed for the door. Jay headed for his locker, pulling it open without really looking in. He cried out when something toppled out of it onto the floor. "Jay, are you ok?" Jeff asked, rushing back into the room with Matt on his tail.

 "Yeah, yeah I'm fine," Jay replied, bending to pick up the object that had fallen out of the locker. "This just fell out of the locker, and scared - " He left off as he realized what he was holding. He stared at it for a moment, then his hand jerked and he dropped it.

 "What?" Jeff asked in confusion. He stooped down and picked up the magazine lying on the floor. He squinted at the pictures, his eyes going wide. "Eww!" he exclaimed, looking around for somewhere to drop the magazine, then throwing it to Matt. Matt made a disgusted face, dropping the magazine in the trash with the book.

 Jay sat down on a bench and took a few deep breaths. His face was pale. Matt moved onto the bench next to him, but Jeff was still staring at the trash can. "Jesus, where do you even get stuff like that?" he wondered. "I mean, those people were actually - "

 "We KNOW what they were doing, Jeff," Matt cut in sharply. "It's called porn, and don't pretend you don't know what it is." He tone of voice softened as he turned his attention to Jay. "Jay?"

 "I'm ok." Jay chuckled, but there wasn't a trace of humor in it. "It's not like I haven't seen stuff like that before. But this is scaring me. It really is. This means that there's someone around, probably in the WWF, who has a real problem with homosexuals. And if they'd do stuff like this - well, who knows what else?"

I stand outside the door, frowning deeply. This is not going the way I planned. I don't want to scare him, I just want to make him see the error of his ways. For some reason, I feel really bad now. No more sneaking around and leaving hints like the book and the magazine. Tonight, I'm going to confront him directly.

 But, at the moment, making sure he's not upset is a bigger concern on my mind. After all, I certainly don't want him to think I'm a psychopath. I want him to be able to rely on me after I help him reform. Hopefully, we can spend a lot of time together. Adam will be out of the picture, so that should leave his spot open in Jay's life. I plan to fill it.

Part 4

 After my match is over, I gather up my things and head out of the arena. In the parking garage, I run into the last the person I wanted to see; Steven Richards. Now, you would think he'd sympathize with my cause, right? Wrong. Dead wrong.

 He smiles and waves as I pass him. I nodd, but try not to look at him. He's wearing his typical short shorts and almost indecently tight tank top, even though it's November. He has got to be the biggest hypocrite I've ever known, even if he would claim that RTC is just a gimmick. Why they picked someone like him for that role, I'll never understand.

 A little while later, I arrive at the club where we're celebrating Jay's birthday. Looking around, I see a lot of WWF superstars here. Some are sitting at tables talking, others are out on the floor dancing. I find a table with some of my friends and sit down. We chat for a while, until Adam comes around and tells all the guests that it's time for cake and presents. I follow all the others to a private room in the back.

 I stop dead in my tracks when I see Jay. He's sitting at a table talking to Jeff. He's wearing form fitting black jeans and a comely, long-sleeved blue shirt. His golden hair is falling gracefully over his shoulders in rich waves. He's never looked so lovely.

 I blink, mentally kicking myself. What the hell am I thinking?!? Men aren't supposed to think of each other as lovely! I think my sensibilities must be getting thrown off by how nervous I feel. I'm hoping Jay will accept what I have to say to him, but considering how he's reacted to everything else, I'm a little afraid he won't.

 Jay looks up at that moment, giving me a devastating smile. I stumble and nearly trip over my own feet. Before I know it, Jay is on his feet and catching me. "Whoa, you ok?" he asks. I nod, not sure myself what happened.

 "Thanks," I murmur, quickly pulling out of his arms. I can NOT be feeling this way!

 "Is everybody here?" Adam calls loudly from the other side of the room. He looks around, trying to figure out if anyone is missing. "Looks good! Let's get started, then! Which should we do first, presents or cake?"

 "Presents!" Jay exclaimed, grinning like a child.

 Adam chuckles. "Ok then, presents it is. Whose do you wanna open first, Jay?"

 Jay peers at the table, which is full of brightly colored packages. He selects one and holds it up to his ear, shaking it. "Don't shake that!!" Val Venis cries, looking horrified.

 "Sorry." Jay shoots Val an apologetic look, then gracefully slides his finger under the tap and pulls off the wrapping, not making a single rip in the paper. It's amazing how he can do that. He is unbelievably graceful. I watch as he opens various presents, one by one. They're all very nice, and he seems pleased. He thanks each guest after opening their present. When he said thank you to me, I felt my knees growing week. I wanted to punch myself for feeling like that! I want to straighten him out, nothing more! He's only my friend, and he can't be more. What he's doing is sick. Isn't that why I want to break him and Adam up?

 It seems to take forever for him to get through all his gifts. I have to grit my teeth to get through it. I need to talk to him tonight, the sooner the better. He needs to start on a more virtuous path immediately. Finally, he comes to the last present. It's a rather large, flat box, from Adam of course.

 Jay looks up at Adam, then back at the box. "Adam, whatever you got me, I'm baffled," he announces.

 Adam crosses his arms, grinning widely. "Well open it and see!"

 Jay chuckles as he pulls the paper off, revealing a white clothing box. He lifts the top, and gasps. "Adam, you didn't!" he exclaims.

 "What?" Jeff inquired, trying to see into the box. "Oh come on, show us!"

 Jay throws the lid off the box, revealing three soccer jerseys. "Get me all three of Steve's Maiden jerseys!" Jay exclaims, pulling one out of the box and holding it against him. His smile is so wide it barely fits on his face. "I didn't think I'd get one! You got me all three!" he cries joyfully. Adam nods, walking around the table and pulling Jay into his arms.

 "Happy birthday," Adam tells his ‘best friend'. Jay is laughing, wiping a tear out of his eye. I feel my gut wrench at the look he's giving Adam. God, for a moment there I thought Jay was going to kiss him right here, in front of all these people. That would be the end for my good friend. The ultimate disaster. Damn Adam and his stupid gifts.

 People begin to swarm around the still excited Jay, all wishing him a happy birthday. Some of them, especially that idiot Hardy, are looking at those stupid jerseys Adam got him. So the blonde bombshell spent a little money on Jay. So what? Jay will be far better off with me. With me as a friend and adviser! No more!

 I wait a few more minutes, until the throng of people surrounding Jay has died down. I touch his arm lightly to get his attention. He turns to me, his beautiful blue eyes twinkling. "Can I talk to you for a moment, alone?" I asked quietly, so no one else can hear.

 "Sure," he agrees, still smiling as I lead him out of the room. We walk out to a deserted hallway, where I'm sure no one will hear us. I take a deep breath. This is it.

Part 5


 I blink, realizing I zoned out. Pull yourself together, Benoit! This is your chance. I can't screw this up. This is my chance to turn Jay away from this path, away from Adam, and help him start a healthier life. But...he looks so nice...I shake my head to snap myself out of it. Still, I can't take my eyes off his perfect lips.

 "Jay," I begin, trying to deny what I'm feeling. I can't be feeling this way! It's wrong. "I need to talk to you about Adam."

 Jay turns slightly pale, but he does a good job covering it up. "What about us?" he asks nervously.

 "About your relationship," I tell him. "I know about you two. I know that you've - been seeing each other, and not like friends!"

 Jay turns white. "I don't know what you're talking about," he whispers.

 "Yes you do! Jay, you can't do this. You shouldn't be with Adam, not like that!" I insist. "It's not right!"

 Jay's face darkens with anger. "Not right? Who the hell are you to judge! I happen to love him! I love him more than anything."

 "Jay, you may feel that way, but - "

 "It was you, wasn't it?" Jay spits as he puts the pieces together. "You left that book, and that disgusting magazine! God, Chris, I thought you were my friend!"

 "I am! That's why I'm doing this!" I reply. "Please, Jay, what you're doing isn't right." For some odd reason, the words sound hollow even in my ears. But I believe all this! Don't I?

 "Some friend!" Jay snorts. "There is absolutely nothing wrong with me, so don't try to tell me there is!"

 My eyes are still focused on his lips. They're so beautiful, I want more than anything to kiss him. The thought hits me like a punch. Kiss him?!? No! Wrong, wrong, wrong. That's why I'm doing this; because what he's doing is wrong. It's not because I want Adam out of his life. It's not because I want him for myself. It's not! It can't be.

 "Jay, please, can't you see how wrong he is for you?" What am I saying now? God, I'm getting so confused.

 Jay's eyes flash. "Who are you to tell me that?" he demands. "You don't know the first thing about Adam, or me for that matter!"

 "I do!" I insist. "Jay, I...I don't want you to be with him, I...." I stumble over my words, finally stopping. I can't believe this is happening. I can't believe I'm feeling this way. But this feeling inside of me is too strong to deny.

 Jay seems beyond shocked when I lean forward and press my lips against his. I can't resist. He starts to kiss me back, then pushes me away. We stare at each other. He's clearly shocked beyond words, and I don't even know what I'm thinking. Much less can I put my feelings into words.

 "Chris, what - " Jay shakes his head and tries again. "What are you doing?"

 I swallow. "I don't know," I whisper. I'm more thinking out loud than actually talking to him. "I'm so confused." I shake my head, closing my eyes. "I found out about you and Adam, and god it just seemed so wrong! So, I thought what I hated was you being wrong. was you being with him. Because......" I pause for a long time, then whisper the words as I realize them. "...I want you."

 Jay stares at me, his mouth agape. "You...Chris, I....I am in love with Adam. That won't change. I'm sorry, but it won't."

 I nod, not really hearing his words. I sink down onto the floor, holding my face in my hands. "Leave me alone," I breathe, closing my eyes tightly. "Please." I can hear his footsteps as he leaves the hall. I'm not upset about his rejection; I can't even think about that now. I've just had a much larger realization, one I certainly never wanted to have. This is going to totally change my life, and I'm scared, and confused. Help?


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