Every night, Test would roll his boyfriend, the incredibly beautiful Christian, into bed, kissing away all his objections, and coaxing him into making love. The tall Canadian couldn't care less how much the third man who always shared a room with them felt about this. He figured that Lance probably enjoyed listening to good sex, since listening was probably the best he was gonna do.
Of course, Test had tried to set Lance up with a few guys, in the interest of getting Christian alone in their hotel room, at which time the pretty young blonde could be persuaded to do things he otherwise would have refused. But for some reason, Lance hadn't clicked with Spike Dudley, William Regal, or Bubba Ray Dudley. He had returned quite early from all three attempted dates, promptly informed Test that he was an utter moron, then stomped off to the shower and slammed the door. So, Test had given up on that count.
But, Test always knew having Lance around would be handy eventually.
And now, at last, it seemed his theory was about to prove true. Christian
had called and informed him that a bunch of the guys from the SmackDown
roster had shown up and spirited him away for a night on the town, and
that he would probably crash with them, and not be returning to Test until
the morning. Test, naturally, was not at all happy about spending the night
alone in a cold bed. So, he decided not to.
"Babe, put down the book."
Lance glanced up from his Stephanie Plum novel, frowning at Test, who was grinning at him in a disturbing manner. "What do you want?" he demanded.
"Sex," Test replied frankly.
Lance blinked, his eyes widening as he wondered if he was hearing things. "Come again?"
Test chuckled. "I said, I want sex."
"Well go find some little slut and go to his room then," Lance snapped. "You even think about bringing someone in here, and you can bet I'll tell Christian!"
Test shook his head, looking very amused. "You're not understanding, babe." He took hold of Lance's book and tossed it across the room, ignoring the smaller Canadian's outraged cry. "I just need someone to step in for Christian tonight. Think you're up to the challenge?"
"What - what are you talking about?" Lance stuttered, his eyes widening as Test pushed him onto his back, crawling onto the mattress and moving on top of him. "Come on Lance, when was the last time you got laid? I won't tell if you don't."
"You're crazy!" Lance sputtered, attempting to push the bigger man off of him. "I - I don't do that sort of thing, not unless I'm in a serious relationship!"
"And you're telling me you've never wanted to just forget everything for one night and have hot, meaningless with some gorgeous stud like myself?" Test purred, taking hold of either side of Lance's button-up top and yanking hard, sending buttons flying everywhere and exposing Lance's muscular chest.
"My shirt!" Lance cried. "You ruined my shirt!"
"Yeah I did baby. Wasn't it exciting?" Test growled, his hands moving down to undo the button on Lance's pants.
"You - you stop this, right now! I'm not that kind of boy!" Lance protested weakly, biting his lip as Test's hand found its way down his pants.
"Funny, feels like you like this," Test chuckled.
Lance flushed beat red. "Test, really - " he began, cut off by Test's hand covering his mouth.
"Baby, come on," Test whispered seductively. "I've seen you looking at me. You can pretend you don't, but you do and you know it." He chuckled again when Lance flushed, his eyes betraying his guilt. "Just let yourself go. One night of passion, and no one'll ever have to know." He removed his hand from Lance's mouth, raising his eyebrows. "Well? Are you gonna sleep in this cold, lonely bed tonight, or are you gonna let me love you?"
Lance swallowed. "You swear no one'll ever find out?" he whispered urgently.
"Cross my heart," Test promised him.
Lance thought for another moment, then grinned and nodded, quickly slipping off his pants and welcoming Test's eager embrace.
"I just have to quick drop in and see him, and then I'll be right back out," Christian was telling Edge and Eddie out in the parking lot.
"Ya sure, homes. We all know you're gonna give him a little quick oral action to keep your man happy," Eddie smirked.
"Hey! Ew!" Edge slapped his lover's shoulder, frowning at the older man. "Don't talk about my brother that way in front of me!"
Eddie chuckled, pulling Edge into his arms as Christian walked away. "Maybe I give you a little action while they're busy, hmm?"
Edge snorted. "I am NOT doing anything in a car!"
"That's what you think, essa," Eddie purred, pushing Edge onto his back and claiming his lips in a heated kiss.
Christian saw just that much before the elevator doors closed, taking him up to the floor his boyfriend's room was on. "Silly horny dorks," he murmured. "I am so NOT giving Test any oral action..." He thought that over a minute, grinning and licking his lips. "Not unless he asks nicely, anyway!" He bounced down the hall, pulling out the keycard to their room.
When he reached the door, he paused for a second, putting his ear up to it to see if he could hear what was going on. There had been one time when Test had decided to throw a poker party in his absence, and he had nearly been molested by a horde of huge, slobbering drunks before Test had carried him to safety, dropping him off with Jericho for the night and swearing that such a thing would never, ever happen again. Not that he didn't trust Test, but he wasn't taking any chances.
However, what he heard was far more disturbing than some drunken party. He heard moaning and the telltale sound of creaking bedsprings. His hands balled into fists, his eyes narrowing into furious little slits. "I'll KILL him!" he hissed. "Whatever WHORE is in there, he's so dead!" With that, he slid the keycard through the lock and charged into the room, right up to the bed where Test was on top of someone. He grabbed his boyfriend's hair and yanked hard, sending Test screaming with pain onto the floor. He gaped at the man he saw lying on his back on the bed.
Lance yanked the sheet up to cover himself, staring at Christian in horror. "Christian!" he squeaked, his voice coming out several octaves too high.
"Lance?" Christian just stared, hardly believing what he saw before him. "You - you were having sex with Test?"
Lance hung his head, looking completely ashamed of himself. "I'm so sorry Christian! I - I know this was so wrong! But - but it was all my fault, honestly! I - I was being provocative, and - and - it wasn't Test's fault, don't let this ruin your relationship! I'm so sorry!"
"Nice try Lance, but he'll never buy that." Test stood up, gazing down at Christian, not looking sorry in the least. "Look, Christian, you weren't supposed to know. Lance here hasn't gotten any in an eternity, so I thought I'd do him a favor and pop his cherry, since you weren't here and I wanted sex. But since you are here now, how ‘bout we just pop into that other bed and you take care of me, huh?"
Both Lance and Test were shocked when Christian's fist seemed to move with light speed, flashing out and connecting hard with Test's jaw. "You asshole!" Christian screamed, wiping at his wet eyes as Test stumbled back, holding his injured jaw. "Fuck you! We're over, you here me! OVER! And you!"
Lance winced, bracing himself in case Christian decided to smack him around, too. He blinked when Christian grabbed his arms and yanked him off the bed, the pretty blonde gathering the sheet around him so he was decent and grabbing his bag. "Come on!" Christian snapped, dragging Lance towards the door. "If you're so damn desperate for a man, then you're coming clubbing with us tonight and we're finding you one!"
Lance was about to object that not only did he hate clubbing, but he wasn't about to walk through the hotel wearing only a bed sheet, but Christian shot him a venomous look before he could get a word out, and he quickly shut his mouth and followed the angry blonde. The walk at to the car was humiliating, especially since they had the bad luck to pass a crowd of their wrestling colleagues, who whistled and hooted at him as he walked by.
Christian, still dragging Lance, stomped through the parking lot and to the car, banging on the car window when he found the doors locked. Edge's rumpled head popped into view, the pretty blonde hissing a few words to his out-of-view boyfriend. After a moment he opened the car door, a pretty blush settling over his cheeks. Christian just rolled his eyes, shoving Lance's bag into Edge's arms.
"Put that in the back, Lance is coming with us," he snapped, walking around to the passenger side of the car. "You can sit in the back with Lance and I'll sit up here with your boyfriend to make sure you don't act like any more of a slut than you already have!"
"Christian, are you ok?" Edge questioned, handing Lance his bag when the sheet-clad brunette gestured frantically for it.
"No I'm not ok!" Christian shouted back. "I just broke up with my boyfriend, ok? I'm not in a great mood right now!"
"Geez, sorry." Edge eyed Lance, who was attempting to struggle into a pair of pants without letting the sheet slip down to expose any part of him. "What's the deal with him? I thought he never went out?"
"Well he is tonight! He's going so we can find him some stud to sleep with, since apparently he's so desperate for one he decided to steal mine!" Christian yelled, sniffing and wiping at his brimming eyes.
Edge looked between them, his lips forming a silent ‘oh'. He hesitated only a moment before moving into action, taking Christian's wrist and leading him to a corner of the parking lot, where he pulled him into his arms and stroked his hair soothingly. Lance could see Christian's shoulders shaking as the pretty blonde clung to his brother, the brunette feeling more ashamed of himself than he ever had in his life.
"Yo essa, nice nips." Lance jumped, quickly covering up his chest when he realized he had let his sheet slip, and Eddie had been staring at his unclothed torso. Eddie just smirked at him, then turned his eyes to watching Edge and Christian, who were talking softly, Christian sniffling occasionally and nodding.
Edge smiled softly at his brother, than put his arm around the younger man's shoulders, walking him back over to the car. "Listen, Christian and I are just gonna stay here and take it easy tonight, ok? We'll have a pajama party with Jericho and see if we can cheer him up. Baby, you take Lance out and find him a man."
"Actually, I really don't need a man - " Lance began, sighing when Edge frowned at him. Accepting that this was to be his punishment for the night, he picked up his bag and threw it in the back seat of the car, climbing in after it.
"Have a good time, baby," Edge murmured, completely ignoring Lance and bending to give Eddie a quick kiss on the lips. "I just better not find out you messed around, because if you do I will never give you head again! And that's a promise."
Eddie just chuckled. "Don't worry, baby," he purred, winking at his lover. "You're the only man feels my latino heat!"
"Good." Edge shared a quickly smile with him, then took Christian and led him towards the elevators. "Don't worry hon," he cooed, patting Christian's shoulder comfortingly. "After some nice chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream, a cup of hot chocolate, and boys night in with me and Jerky, you'll be just fine!"
THE END