Edge: "Ouch!"
Christian: "Quiet!"
E "That hurts!"
C "I'll be done in a sec."
E "But it...ow! Ouch!"
C "Stop being such a baby."
E "I'm not! You'd be complaining too if...ow!"
C "Hush. Last one, ok?"
E "Ok...ow!"
C "There, done."
E "Thank god. How do I look?"
C "Beautiful. Smooth as a baby. It's a good thing, too, ‘cos you were starting to look all shaggy. I told you, regular waxing is a must!"
E "It still hurts like hell."
C "Well, now you won't have to do it again for a while."
E "Isn't it your turn now?"
C "Er...yeah, I guess."
E "Ha! Now you can see how much it hurts."
C "I know how much it hurts, we've done this before."
E "Ok, what do you want done first, your back or ass?"
C "My ass is not hairy! It's naturally smooth!"
E "Back then?"
C "My back isn't hairy either! I just need my chest and legs done."
E "Oh, thighs first, then."
C "You know you're not gonna get laid tonight if you keep acting this way."
E "It's my fault you have hairy thighs?"
C "I don't! I don't at all!"
E "You're right. Sorry baby."
C "It's ok. Just get it over with!"
E "Fine. Ready?"
C "Yes."
E "Here we go."
C "Ow!"
E "Hurts, doesn't it?"
C "Yes. Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow!"
E "And you were yelling at ME for whining?"
C "So? Owwwwwww!"
E "Almost done."
C "Thank god! Oww! Ow! Owww!"
E "There we are."
C "Done?"
E "Done."
C "Yes!"
E "You're now smooth as well as beautiful, darling."
C "Can we have some fun to make up for what we just went though in the name of beauty?"
E "Sure as hell can! Come here baby."
...some giggles and the sound of kissing, then some static...
C "Ow! What the hell did I roll on?"
E "Huh?"
C "There's something digging into my back!"
E "Let me see...there's some hard thing stuck in the cushions of this couch..."
C "It's another mic!"
E "God, has the WWF been invaded by perverts?!?"
C "Well, they won't be using this one again!"
...a loud crash, then static...