Shane "Help! Hide me!"
Booker "What's up sucka?"
S "He's after me!"
B "Who?"
S "Big Show! He's drunk and trying to catch me so he can kiss me at midnight!"
B "Why don'tcha just kiss him then?"
S "Cos I don't wanna kiss him! I wanna kiss you!"
B"Well, a'ight then! Get your sexy little ass over here babe!"
Big Show (Paul) "Shane!"
S "Aaaahhh!"
B "Hey, back off man!"
P "Not until you give me my twink back!"
B "He's my twink now, sucka!"
P "Oh yeah? Well why don't you ask your twink what his lips were wrapped around 15 minutes ago!"
S "Eep!"
B "What?!?"
S "Well, erm, uh, you know I've had a lot of alcohol tonight..."
B "What kinda sucka you think I am? Screw this! I'll find some other twink to kiss! You can have him Show."
S "Book! Bookie baby wait! Wait! If you still kiss me at midnight, then I'm yours all night, baby, every part of me!"
B "No way sucka! I got a horde of twinks drooling over me, I don't need Show's leftovers! He's yours big man."
P "I don't want him either!"
S "Uh! Why?"
P "You just promised yourself to him if he kissed you! I resent being a second choice!"
S "But it's only 30 seconds to midnight!"
B "You didn't say that! Tell me you didn't just say that!"
P "It's true; 25 seconds now."
B "That ain't enough time to find another twink!"
...a pause...
P "Say, Book, um...if you want, maybe we could, you know, kiss?"
B "Well...aw, why not? Let's!"
S "Heeeeeyyyyy! One of you kiss me!"
P "5 seconds!"
5!
4!
3!
2!
1!
HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!
...sound of kissing...
S "Hey!"
...continued sound of kissing...
S "HEY!"
...continued sound of kissing...
B "Wow..."
P "Yeah. That was pretty...well, what you said."
B "Hey, Show, whaddaya say tonight, I play the twink?"
P "Sounds good to me! Have I mentioned I absolutely love your long legs?"
B "Heh, ya really like 'em?"
P "Hell yeah! Come on, there are bedrooms upstairs."
S "NO! Hey! Get back here! THIS IS MY HOUSE!!"