Prologue

 Jay's POV

 I lie awake in bed, staring at the ceiling. I can hear Adam in the bathroom, brushing his teeth. Adam. I'm glad I found him. As much as I can be glad, that is. I really don't feel much these days. The only thing feelings do is hurt you; remind you how sad and pathetic your life is. I was already like this when I met Adam, my beautiful blonde lover. He made me think, for a minute, that just maybe there was such a thing as love; that someone could love me, that is.

 He must be the sweetest man on earth. He always tells me how beautiful I am, and how much he loves me. He buys me things, too; surprises me with romantic dinners; all those sweet things lovers do. I've never had someone treat me like that; like they really care about me. It was starting to scare me, actually. I wouldn't know how to deal with someone loving me. No one's ever loved me, my whole life. I was actually relieved when he finally took me to bed. Sex I understand; lust I understand. It explained his other behavior, too. He thinks he had to wine and dine me to get me to spread my legs. He doesn't; I'd still put out if he did nothing. I belong to him now, and I have no right to turn him down. He deserves my body just for putting up with me.

 I hear a voice call out my name. I take my eyes off the ceiling and look at Adam, who is standing in the bathroom door in a long sleepshirt and nothing else. I fake a smile, trying to look hungry for him. He growls as he crawls into bed, pulling me into a hard kiss. I slide my hands up his back, pulling the shirt off over his head. It's obvious that he wants sex; wants my body. I continue to kiss him as his hands run over my body; his property. He likes me to be very responsive, so I always am.

 After I feel he's satisfied with my kisses, I push him onto his back, licking my way down his front. He murmurs his approval, pleading for more. I obey, positioning myself between his legs and taking him in my mouth. He moans and thrusts his hips. I take him all the way down and begin bobbing my head, faking a moan to convince him I'm having a good time. He cries out my name and pleads for me to make him come.

 Instead, I pull away. I know the way he likes it; he likes to come in my ass, not my mouth. I roll onto my back, pulling him on top of me and spreading my legs wide open. He takes a moment to stretch me out with his fingers, all the while telling me how beautiful I am. I gasp as he gently penetrates me, although I really feel nothing. He begins thrusting in a gentle rhythm; far too gentle for him to be getting much out of it. He's so concerned about hurting me.

 Using the pressure of my heels on his backside, I force him to go harder, deeper. He growls at me again and moans loudly, his speed increasing as his need grows. I make all the right noises; move in all the right ways; but really, this is doing nothing for me. Sex hasn't done anything for me in a long, long time, since far before I met Adam. But it's my duty to make him happy, and part of that, for him, is that it make me happy. Good thing I've learned to fake it so well over the years.

 I feel that he's close to the brink. With one more thrust, he lets out a strangled cry and comes inside me. I force myself to come as well, not feeling the orgasm which appears to rock through my body. His form collapses onto me, the breath thundering in his chest. I close my eyes and wrap my arms around his back, telling him how good it was. He tells me that I was wonderful, and again says that I'm beautiful. He kisses me once, then rolls off to the side of me. I actually have a spark of feeling as he draws me into his arms and holds me tight, whispering 'I love you' again and again.

 My eyes fill with tears as he drifts off to sleep. He's so great. I love it when Adam holds me; even when we don't have sex, he holds me. No one else has ever held me; hell, damn few of my lovers even stayed in the same bed after I pleased them. When they did, it was only so they could fuck me at their pleasure. They knew I'd put out whenever they wanted. Sometimes Adam and I fuck in the morning, but that's not why he stays with me. He stays because sex means more to him than it did to the others; he thinks it means he has to take care of me.

 The tears began to slide down me cheeks. I hate myself for making him put out all that extra effort. He shouldn't do that, not for me. It doesn't matter that I love how he treats me; I don't deserve it. I'm a whore, a piece of cheap trash. That's how he should treat me; like his whore, his easy fuck, not as his lover. To be lovers would imply that we were equal. Equal? We couldn't be further from it. I don't deserve him. The thought echoes in my head over and over as the tears flow down my face.

 I don't deserve him.


 At the moment, I'm feeling extremely good. Adam and I just finished a great match, and we're alone in our locker room. Adam has me pinned against the wall, and he's kissing me passionately. My arms are wrapped around his back as I gladly meet his lips. He doesn't even want sex right now; he just wants to taste my lips, and I'm happy to let him. I haven't been so depressed lately; I still know I don't deserve him, but I seem to make him happy. It makes me feel happy to know that I please him.

 "Geez, guys, cool it," chides Chris Jericho as he walks into the room. We're sharing a locker room tonight, for some reason. "You can make out later!"

 Adam draws back, smiling at me brightly. "I love you," he whispers.

 Chris rolls his eyes. "Spare me the sap." He says it in a joking way, unlike some others who I've heard commenting on our relationship. Chris doesn't know what a whore I am. He's always been very nice to me. It's just the way he is; he's nice to everyone.

 I think he's the only other person, besides Adam, who's shown me kindness. Everyone else either treats me as a cheap slut, although I don't sleep around anymore, or regards me with a kind of cold distaste, or disgust. It's perfectly fair of them. I've earned every bit of it. I don't respect myself; how could anyone else respect me? However, at the moment I couldn't care less about that. I don't care about anything else when I'm in Adam's arms. Not that I believe he really loves me, but at least he's nice. Nicer than I deserve, but I'm a selfish piece of trash, so I'm not going to object.

 "I love you too," I tell Adam, just as Chris' boyfriend enters the room.

 Jeff makes a face, but quickly controls it before Adam sees. He knows I saw; he doesn't care. He thinks I'm the cheapest lying slut in the WWF. I can see him wondering how many people I've said that to. Not many, actually. Most don't care to hear it, they just take my body and leave.

 "Fuck!" screams Chris from the showers. We all stare as he comes back into the locker room, a towel wrapped around his waist and an angry scowl on his face. "Fucking shower's broken!" Chris announces angrily. He grabs his soap, shampoo, and conditioner and stomps toward the door. "Jeff, baby, I'm going to your dressing room, ok?"

 Jeff frowns in a teasing way. "I don't know, Chris. Matt's probably in there, and I'm not sure I want him seeing you naked."

 Chris laughs, his angry expression dissipating. "Oh yeah, baby, me and Matt!" He chuckles and shakes his head.

 "Hang on, I'm coming too," Adam announces, grabbing his shower supplies and a towel. He follows Chris out the door, pausing briefly to smile at me. "Don't you go anywhere until I get back, baby," he instructs me, a wicked glimmer in his eyes. "I'm not through with you yet."

 I nod, suppressing a yawn. If he wants me to wait, I will, no matter how tired I am. He notices, and seems to reconsider. "On second thought, why don't you just meet me back at the hotel," he decides. "Maybe Jeff can give you a ride."

 Chris sticks his head back in the door. "Yeah, baby, can't you take him on your bike?" Chris pushes.

 Jeff makes a funny face. "Well, I COULD, but it would be a rather awkward position," he jokes. Frowning, Chris marches back into the room and wacks him in the side of the head, but he's chuckling as he and Adam walk down the hall. Jeff just sits there for a few minutes, looking at me. It makes me jump when he finally speaks.

 "You're a slut, you know." I don't argue, just keep my eyes on the ground. I know what I am. "A cheap slut." Jeff crosses his arms, his eyes boring into me. His voice is accusing. "Tell me, how many people are you fucking behind Adam's back?"

 I look up at him, surprised by the question. "None!" I insist.

 Jeff snorts. "Yeah right! You expect me to believe that?"

 "It doesn't matter if you believe it, it's true," I whisper, staring at the floor once more. Don't confuse what I'm doing; I'm not defending my honor or anything. I don't have any. No, I'm defending Adam. I'm his property. If anyone else touches me, it's a violation of his property. He holds the sole rights to my body now.

 Jeff shakes his head, clearly not believing me. "Ok. Then how many people did you fuck before Adam?"

 I turn a bit red, my eyes staring at the tiles. "You expect me to know a number?"

 Jeff's voice is extremely condescending, his eyes narrowed. "Why don't you name some of the men you've spread your pretty legs for, Jay?" He smirks and holds up his hand. "Wait a minute, forget it. I don't want to be here all night." He laughs. "You are such a whore. You're everybody's favorite cheap, meaningless fuck. You're just like any filthy streetwalker, only you - " He walks over to me, leaning down with his hands on the bench to either side of me, his face right in front of mine. " - don't even get paid for it. You're a free, easy fuck." He raises a finger and trails it across my cheek in a way that makes me very uncomfortable. "Then again, you definitely do that well..." His manner changes abruptly, and he pulls me to my feet. "Come on. We should get going," he says casually. I'm surprised, but relieved. I follow him out to the deserted parking lot. He smiles at me as he swings his leg over his bike, but stops me when I try to climb on behind him.

 "Sit in front of me," he instructs, sliding back and patting the space in front of him.

 I frown, feeling both confused and uneasy. "But, how can you drive with me in front of you?" I object.

 Jeff chuckles. "I can't, baby. Nothing but you, that is." In a swift movement, he leans in and captures my lips with his, his hands slipping under my shirt and caressing my chest.

 Shocked, I push him away. I'd run if I wasn't straddling the leather seat of his bike, his arms preventing me from dismounting. "Jeff, don't!" I protest, fear running wild in my mind. If Adam finds out about this, he'll leave me! I can't lose him, I need him.

 "Come on baby." Jeff uses his hands to pull my shirt off over my head, then reaches for my belt. "A quick fuck's all I want. Adam and Chris never have to know."

 "No!" I struggle against him, grabbing his hands before he can get my belt off. "Jeff, no! I'm Adam's, you can't have me!"

 Jeff's eyes narrow. He stops fighting me, and slaps me across the face. I gasp, putting a hand up to my cheek. I've been hit before, but I wasn't expecting this. "I can't have you?!?" Jeff screams. "You've fucked practically every WWF employee with a dick, but I don't get a turn?!?"

 I wince at his rage. "I - I'm sorry," I stutter, "but Jeff, I'm not mine to give right now! I'm Adam's, only he can ok sharing me."

 Jeff glares daggers at me. "I said he'd never know!"

 I shake my head. "It doesn't matter. I'm still his."

 Jeff's expression is hard. "Well, if you won't put out, you little slut, you can find your own damn ride!" He promptly throws me off the bike and zooms away, leaving me lying in the middle of the parking lot.

 "Jeff!! Please!" I call desperately, but he's already gone. I collapse against one of the few remaining cars, my body racked with sobs. Good job, Jay! You've managed to fuck everything up again! It would've been easy to give in to him; just give him a little ass, so he'd be happy. But I couldn't. I could at least have given him head. Maybe that would've appeased him. God, how could I tell him no?

 I wince at my own thoughts. I COULDN'T have allowed that! I belong to Adam. My body is his property. He owns me. I can't give my body to anyone else. That would be robbery; stealing what's not mine from the most caring master I've ever had.

 I get slowly to my feet, freezing when I feel eyes upon me. "That wasn't very nice," hisses a low voice. I look up, seeing Buh-Buh Ray Dudley step out of the shadows. His eyes are narrowed. "Seeing you and the Hardy get it on would've been really hot," Buh-Buh continues. I back away. His voice is dangerous.

 My back hits a wall, and I begin to shake when D'von appears out of nowhere. They've got me trapped. I see more figures stepping out from the darkness. Lo Down; Benoit; Malenko; Saturn; Shane; Angle. Shit, what's Kurt doing here? He's Adam's friend! So I thought, that is.

 "You used to be such a good little whore," Buh-Buh drawls, running a finger across my cheek. "But recently, we've all grown rather unhappy with you. And I think you know why." Buh-Buh's fingers trail down my side, reaching around to grab my ass. "You've stopped fucking us," he hisses into my ear.

 "I - please, leave me alone," I beg, closing my eyes to try and shut this all out. Buh-Buh's fingers are kneading into my ass now. I saw the lust in his eyes. This can't happen. I can't let it. I belong to Adam!

 "Now that we've got you completely at our mercy?" Buh-Buh grins evilly. "Never. Why should we, Jay? You were always our whore."

 I whisper something quietly, too quiet for my tormentor to hear. "What?" he demands. "Speak up, slut!"

 "I belong to Adam now," I choke out. "Please, I - I'm his. I'm his whore! I can only be with him."

 Buh-Buh snorts. "And what if we don't give a fuck about Adam?" he hisses, as he leans down and takes one of my nipples into his mouth, sucking hungrily.

 "Please!" I squeak, tears in my eyes. "I'm Adam's!"

 "I don't give a fuck!" Buh-Buh repeats, grabbing my belt and pulling it off forcefully. He practically rips my pants as he tears them off, leaving me naked and exposed. "Fuck, you've got such a hot body," Buh-Buh growls as he looks me over, taking considerable liberties with his hands. I'm shaking violently by this time, as he reaches for his own belt and his pants fall around his ankles.

 "Please - Kurt!" I plead, desperately searching for any way out. Kurt's always seemed so nice...how could he be part of this?

 Kurt steps forward, and from the look on his face I can tell he isn't going to help me. His eyes are filled with lust. "You brought this on yourself, Jay," he tells me coldly, his eyes running down my body and focusing on my exposed manhood. His licks his lips hungrily, then continues. "You had no right to stop fucking us. We never gave you leave from your role as our whore." He runs his hand over my bare side down to my hip, making me shiver. "I can't wait to suck you off," he states in a low, husky voice. His eyes are glowing.

 "Why are you doing this?" I cry, the tears beginning to dribble down my face.

 Kurt gives me a wicked grin. "Don't you know, baby? Because I like having meat in my mouth. There's nothing I like more than swallowing a good, juicy piece of meat."

 Buh-Buh motions for Kurt to back off. "You'll have your turn," he tells the Olympian as he grabs my wrists and pins them against the wall. "But I get the bitch first." I struggle, but it's no use. "Spread your legs, bitch," Buh-Buh hisses in my ear. His body is pressed against mine, his hard cock digging into my thigh. Tears staining my cheeks, I shake my head. "D'von!" Buh-Buh calls. His brother walks over and punches me in the side.

 I cry out in pain. Buh-Buh uses my distraction to force open my legs. I sob as he forces his way inside me, delivering harsh, painful thrusts into my body. It's not just the pain, although it hurts like hell. I'm sobbing because I know I'm betraying Adam. I'm loaning myself out to another man, giving what's not mine to give. Adam could never love me after this. After I let this happen. He'll probably never want to see me again.

 After what seems like an eternity, Buh-Buh comes, unloading all his seed into my ass as he keeps pumping into me. I sob louder, my body quaking in absolute agony. Buh-Buh pulls out and lets me fall to the ground. His shaft is covered with blood. Kurt happily volunteers to clean it off for him, dropping to his knees as D'von yanks me to my feet and begins pounding into me.

 They all have their turn. Each one forces me to comply; to spread my legs like the cheap whore I am. They all violate me, not caring that I'm ripped and bleeding inside. All except Kurt, that is. After he's cleaned the rest of them off, he tells Benoit and Saturn to hold my arms, then gets on his knees in front of me. I shudder as his tongue circles around the head of my shaft. No one's done this to me since the last time I was with Kurt.

 He takes his time, clearly relishing the feel of my cock sliding down his throat. He bobs his head in a steady rhythm, moaning around the large member in his mouth. I close my eyes, not even trying to stop the tears. Every minute of this is burning agony. I concentrate hard, forcing myself to come in his mouth. He looks a little annoyed, but his expression turns to one of bliss as he drinks all I have to offer, sucking on my shaft with a force that makes me gasp.

 "That was daaaaamn hot," he purrs, running his tongue down my shaft one more time, then rising to his feet. "Til the next time I suck you," he coos, kissing me deeply and sucking briefly on my tongue. He gestures to Benoit and Saturn to follow him. The others have already gone. As they walk away, I collapse and curl into a tiny ball, trying to ignore the burning pain in my ass. The pain of truth hurts far more. The truth that Adam will never again say I'm beautiful, or give me flowers, or kiss me gently...or say he loves me. Feeling like I've been ripped into 1000 pieces, I bury my head in my hands and weep uncontrolably. 


"You know, I don't think Jeff would appreciate the way you were ogling Matt," Adam was saying, laughing and shaking his head.

 "I was not ogling!" Chris objected.

 Adam raised a pretty blonde eyebrow. "Sure you weren't. You were staring at him like he was a nice, fresh, juicy piece of meat. You can deny it all you want, but it's true."

 Chris rolled his eyes. "Like you weren't? Matt is soooo - "

 "Yummy?" Adam filled in, with a big grin.

 Chris laughed. "Oh yeah, he is definitely yummy." He pulled out his keys as they approached his car, which Jay and Adam had ridden to the arena in. His face turned white as he rounded the end of the car, heading for the driver's side. A shaking form, which had been hidden from view by the car, was lying slumped in the corner. Chris thought he saw bare flesh and blood. He was frozen in his tracks until Adam tapped him on the shoulder.

 "What's wrong?"

 Chris raised a shaky finger to point at the man curled up in the corner. Adam's eyes widened, a look of fear coming across his features as he noticed the man's long blonde hair. "Oh god, is that - "

 "I don't know," Chris squeaked, barely able to breath. He and Adam looked at each other, then bolted towards the slumped body.

 "Jay!" Adam cried in distress, turning his lover to face him. Jay's eyes were swollen, his face streaked by tears. His hair was a mess, and blood was smeared across his lower back and buttox. Adam pull Jay's broken body into his arms, tears running down his own cheeks. Jay groaned in pain, his eyes sliding open. He looked only half conscious.

 "Jay, w-what happened?" Adam whispered, holding Jay tightly. He couldn't stop himself from crying at seeing his lover in this state.

 "I - I'll go get a blanket," Chris stuttered, dashing towards his car.

 "Baby, what happened?" Adam questioned softly. He was shocked when Jay weakly tried to push him away.

 "No," Jay whispered, his voice barely audible. "Leave me alone."

 "Baby, I'm not gonna hurt you," Adam assured the golden blonde, stroking his hair gently.

 "Here, put him in this," Chris offered as he ran back to them with a blanket. Adam wrapped it around his lover, who was too weak to protest further. Adam gently picked Jay up and carried him to the car, where he placed him carefully in the back seat and climbed in next to him. The taller blonde pulled his shivering partner into his arms and tried to comfort him as Chris began driving towards their hotel.

 "Baby, it'll be ok," Adam cooed. "Are you hurt, baby? Do you need a doctor?" Jay just shook his head, lying unmoving in Adam's embrace. His eyes were staring blankly into space. "Baby?" Adam said softly. "Baby, please say something!"

 "Why?" Jay whispered, taking Adam by surprise.

 "Why what?" Adam asked, his brow furrowing in confusion.

 Jay shook his head, blinking back yet more tears. "What's the point? I - I know that after this, you couldn't possibly - couldn't possibly still want me!" He buried his head in Adam's shoulder and began sobbing. "I'm sorry I'm such a whore! I'm so sorry!"

 "Baby, this wasn't your fault," Adam stated, rubbing Jay's back as the golden blonde wept.

 "No, it - it is my fault. They were right; I always was their whore, what - what right did I have to stop? I - I told them because I'm yours now, that's why I can't be with them anymore. But th-they didn't care! I'm sorry, Adam, I told them! I did! I tried to get away, but I couldn't..." Jay's voice faded as his sobs quieted. He sat silently, still shaking.

 Adam wrapped his arms tighter around his lover, his eyes wide with shock. He couldn't believe what Jay had just said. "Jay, I love you," he said forcefully, laying a gentle kiss on Jay's cheek. "There was nothing you could've done, it wasn't your fault. No one has the right to do that without your permission, baby. I won't blame you because they - " Adam swallowed, choking on the word, " - raped you."

 Jay was silent, shaking his head. Adam wasn't sure exactly what Jay was thinking, but he knew he didn't like this. How could Jay think it was his fault that someone raped him? Adam felt a boiling rage forming in the pit of his stomach. Whatever monsters had done this were definitely going to pay.

 "Baby, who did this to you?" Adam whispered, gently caressing Jay's cheek in a comforting gesture. "Who forced themselves on you?"

 Jay shook his head. "Can't tell," he whispered.

 "Yes you can, baby. I need to know," Adam insisted.

 "No." Jay refused to look at Adam. "I can't let you go after them. I'm not worth it. They were just reminding me of my place. I'm a whore; I'm everyone's whore! It would've been fine if I'd just said yes to him; then they would've left me alone, they just wanted to watch. I wouldn't have even known they were there. All he wanted was a quick fuck; hell, that's pretty much my specialty! Cheap, meaningless sex. I had no right to say no; I shouldn't have," Jay babbled, spilling it all out before he could stop himself.

 Adam looked horrified. He couldn't find words, merely drawing his lover closer to him. Suddenly, a realization dawned on him as Jay's words sunk in. "Jay, why didn't Jeff give you a ride home?" he asked.

 Jay blinked in surprised. "We - we got separated," he lied quickly.

 Adam could see Chris listening attentively at the mention of his boyfriend's name. "Baby, was Jeff a part of this?" Adam inquired softly. Chris stiffened at his words, and Adam saw a distinct scowl forming on the blonde's face.

 "Jeff didn't do this," Jay whispered.

 "Maybe he didn't rape you, but - did he ask you for sex?" Adam pushed. Jay just shook his head and bit his tongue, refusing to say anything more.


When they got back to the hotel, Chris went up to Adam's room with him. They carried Jay into the bathroom, Chris helping while Adam cleaned his lover up. Chris was left sitting in the bathroom, holding Jay, while Adam went to get the golden blonde some clothes.

 "It's gonna be ok," Chris whispered to Jay. They were both wet, and each had a towel wrapped around his waist. Chris had shed his clothes to help clean Jay, and Adam had done the same. They weren't shy; they saw each other naked in the locker room all the time. Besides, sex was the furthest thing from their minds as they wiped off Jay's abused body. The horror of it all was enough to kill any hint of a sexual atmosphere, period.

 Chris looked up as Adam reappeared, carrying a small bag and two short white bathrobes. He was already wearing a third robe, which came down to his mid-thighs. Normally, it would've been quite sexy, but all three were too distracted to notice. Chris slid into his robe and helped Jay into the remaining one. It was a difficult task, as Jay refused to put any of his own energy into the task.

 "Let's move him to the bed," Adam instructed. He picked Jay up in his arms, carrying him into the bedroom and laying him gently on the mattress.

 Jay sighed resignedly, wrapping his arms around Adam's neck and pulling the tall blonde on top of him. He spread his legs and wrapped them around Adam's waist. "I'm afraid I won't be very good tonight," he whispered apologetically, undoing the tie on Adam's robe and pulling it open.

 Adam stared at him in shock. "Jay, I don't want to have sex with you!" he objected.

 Tears filled Jay's eyes. He kept his legs around Adam's hips, desperately running his hands across Adam's smooth back. "Please Adam. I want to make you happy. If - if you don't want me any more - "

 Adam leaned in and kissed Jay deeply "Baby, I do want you, I love you," he assured the trembling golden blonde. "You just aren't up to it right now, baby. You're hurt, you need to heal."

 Jay whimpered, tightening his legs so their groins were pressed together. "Please, Adam," he begged. "Fuck me! No one's ever wanted me for anything but sex. P-please, I love how you are with me, how sweet you are, I don't wanna lose that. And, I - I know I will if I don't make you happy, give you sex. Please!"

 Adam's mouth was agape. "You think I only want you for sex?" Jay nodded, blinking tears from his eyes. Adam shook his head in disbelief. "How could you possibly think that? I love you! When we're intimate, it's to supplement that love, not for the sex itself! Jay, baby, I love you for you, not your body. Just being around you, seeing you smile, that's what makes me happy."

 Jay shook his head. "You don't have to lie for me, Adam, I'm not worth it. Just take me, take your pleasure and leave me, like everyone does."

 Adam wrenched himself out of Jay's arms and legs, standing up and quickly pulling his robe closed. Jay began to cry, pressing his face into the pillow. "Jay, baby, don't cry," Adam whispered, sitting down next to Jay and pulling the golden blonde into his arms. "Baby, I love you, I do. I'm not lying, and I'm not using you for sex."

 "But they all do," Jay whispered. "All of them. I - I'm good in bed, I know that. Men want my body. And - and I'd always given it to everyone, but th-then, I stopped, and they were angry."

 Adam rubbed Jay's back soothingly, his face set with determination. "Jay, I'm going to ask you again: Who did this? Who violated you?" Jay shook his head. Adam sighed, glancing up at Chris. The blonde Canadian was leaning against the door, looking a little embarrassed. In his right hand was the bag Adam had brought into the bathroom earlier. "I really hate to do this, but I really feel I have to," Adam stated, motioning to his friend. "Chris, the bag, please."


Jay's POV

 I let my eyes drift closed. I don't know what Adam's planning, but it doesn't matter. I'm sure I've lost him. I gasp as a sharp pain rips at my forearm, my eyes flying open. I stare at the sight of Adam pulling a needle out of my skin. What the hell?!?

 "Relax, baby," Adam tells me, setting the needle aside. "You'll be fine."

 "What did you give him?" Chris inquired, coming to stand on the other side of the bed.

 "It's a truth serum," he replies.

 I feel fear rise in my mind. Oh god, they can't find out! Not about what happened. "No!" I cry, shaking my head. "Adam, please, no! You don't want to know!"

 He sits on the bed next to me, taking my hand and holding it in his own. "I have to know, baby. I'm sorry, but I have to."

 I close my eyes. I can feel the drug taking hold. Shit, now he'll find out everything. I'd better pray he doesn't ask the right questions. If he does...god, he'll never want to look at me again! I've told so many lies, deceived him so many ways. This will be my end. I feel Adam's hand brush against my cheek, and I open my eyes.

 "Alright, baby. I know this is hard, but you have to tell me. First, tell me why Jeff didn't take you back to the hotel." His voice is calm and soothing. I glance at Chris, seeing in his eyes considerable interest, over this question in particular.

 "He kicked me off his bike," I blurt out, against my will.

 "Why did you do that?" Adam's voice is still low and calm.

 "He got mad," I continue, wishing I could stop myself. "I said no to him, and he got mad." I can see Chris stiffen, but he says nothing. He and Adam exchange a glance.

 "Said no to what, baby?" Adam asks.

 "Sex." I can't stop the words. God, they'll both hate me for this! "He wanted sex, but I said I couldn't because I'm with you." I stare up into Adam's eyes, silently pleading for forgiveness.

 "Jeff asked you to sleep with him?" Chris asked in shock.

 "Not sleep." Damn this drug! It's making me volunteer things I definitely shouldn't be. "Just right there on the motorcycle, he wanted me."

 Chris' face gets very dark, and his eyes narrow. I brace myself for a blow. He should hit me. He has every right to hit me, the pathetic, adulterous whore I am. "I can't believe him!" Chris hisses, looking very dangerous. "He was going to fuck you right there in the parking lot? Where anyone could've been watching?!?"

 "There was someone watching." Dammit! Bite your tongue, Jay! Anything to stop this!

 ""There was?" Adam squeezes my hand, caressing my cheek gently with his fingers. "Is that who hurt you, baby? The people watching?"

 "Yes." Chris is watching me attentively, still looking angry but clearly trying to push it back for the moment. He listens silently.

 "Who was it?" Adam asks simply.

 "The Dudleys," I choke out. "Buh-Buh started it. Then I saw the rest of them. There were so many, I - I couldn't escape."

 "Who?" Adam breathes, a dangerous note in his voice.

 "D'lo and Chaz," I spill out, "Benoit, Saturn, Malenko. And - and - " I stumble on the last two names. "And - Kurt and Shane."

 Adam stares at me wide-eyed. "SHANE MCMAHON?!? He raped you?"

 "They all did," I whisper.

 "And - and Kurt?"

 I nod. "Y-yes. I - I asked him why; I thought he was your friend. He - he said because he likes having meat in his mouth. He took me that way, after the others were finished. He had Chris and Perry restrain me. Adam, I - I - I'm so sorry!" By this time tears are streaming down my cheeks again, and I'm shaking violently.

 "Jay, sweetheart, I'm sorry," Adam apologizes, pulling me into his arms. His tears fall onto my shoulder like burning acid. What does he have to be sorry for? He's been nothing but wonderful to me. "I'm so sorry I let this happen," he sobs, hugging me tightly against him. "God, Jay, I'm sorry. I should've stayed with you. I should've protected you!"

 Chris joins the hug, wrapping his arms around both our shoulders. There are tears in his eyes as well. We each cry quietly for a while, then just hold each other. I don't know if I should say anything. I don't know what to do. Finally, Adam draws back, smiling at both of us faintly.

 "I'm sorry," he whispers. "I was trying to be strong, but I - I couldn't be. Jay, I - I don't know what to say to you, I just don't know how to comfort you. I can only tell you that this wasn't your fault, and I'd never blame you for it. I'll help you get over it, Jay, baby, I swear I'll be there for you. I love you."

 "No you don't."

 Adam starts in shock. "W-what?" he stammers.

 "No one can love me," I choke out. "No one ever has, ever. But everyone wants sex from me, and some guys - like you - do lots of extra stuff so they think they earn it. You don't have to say you love me - I - I know it isn't true." I babble on before I can stop myself. "It doesn't matter what they did to me, nothing physical matters. I haven't felt anything in years! I - I was just upset ‘cos you're the nicest master I've ever had, you treat me so well, like - like I'm actually a person and not just a whore."

 Adam is staring at me in disbelief. "Jay, you - I - " He stops and swallows, attempting to collect himself. Then it dawns on him the meaning of my words. "Wait, you mean that - that when we have sex - make love, that is - when we're intimate with each other, you feel nothing?"

 I nod, forced to tell the truth by the drug still in my system. "Yes."

 "B-bu-but - but you always seem to love it, and - and you come and everything; how can you not feel joy from it? Pleasure?"

 I shrug. "I've learned to fake it. I can even fake an orgasm, but I never feel one."

 "But - " Adam stops, and starts again, taking my hand and holding it so tightly it almost hurts. "Jay, I love you, I really do. And, I have to know - do you love me?" His eyes are sincere and desperate. I feel a tremor run through me. He's telling the truth. He loves me. He loves me!

 Unable to control my soaring emotions, which seem to have suddenly reawakened out of nowhere, I throw myself into his arms and burst out crying. "Adam, I do love you, I just - you - and you love me? You love me?!? I didn't think anyone could - god, I - I - I love you so much! I really love you!" Adam begins laughing, tears of joy flooding his eyes. My ferocious lunge knocked him onto his back, and I crouch over him, smothering his face in kisses. I feel like a great weight has just been lifted off my shoulders, the shackles cut off from around my limbs. He loves me!!!

 Adam and I just lay in each other's arms for a while, letting our joy sink in and spread through our entire beings.


Chris watched the joyous couple holding each other. He was very happy for them, but he also felt sad inside. He had to wonder if he would ever find love like that. His relationship with Jeff was over. What Jeff had done was inexcusable. He wondered if he should leave as Adam and Jay sat up at last, wrapping their arms around each other and gazing into each other's eyes.

 "I love you," Adam whispered, leaning forward and meeting Jay's lips in a deep, passionate kiss. Jay's eyes widened as jolts of electricity shot through him. God, he hadn't felt that in years! He eagerly kissed back, shocked at the hungry stirring in the pit of his stomach. Somehow, Adam's declaration of love had woken desires that he had thought long since dead. Want; need; lust. Jay reveled in these new, yet very familiar urges.

 Jay glanced at Chris as he and Adam drew apart. The gorgeous blonde looked very uncomfortable. Jay chuckled, suddenly feeling rather wicked. "Adam," he drawled, casting a sultry glance at his lover, "Why don't you cheer Chris up?"

 Chris jumped at the mention of his name. "What?" he stuttered.

 Adam looked at Jay inquiringly. "What do you mean, my love?"

 Jay grinned broadly. "I mean, love, that I'm feeling very hot." He glanced between his blonde companions, licking his lips. "And, since it's been years since I've felt so excited about bedroom activities, I'm not in much of a mood to wait."

 Adam looked unsure, his fingers trailing over Jay's knee. "But baby, I don't think you can - "

 "Me?" Jay chuckled. "I just said you're making me hot. No, tonight I just want to watch. Ease back into it. So?" He raised his eyebrows, looking between Adam and Chris.

 Chris was about to say something, but before he could his mouth was covered by Adam's full, delicious lips. The shorter blonde was gasping when Adam drew back. "Adam, that was - " Chris put a hand to his chest and swallowed, then glanced at Jay. "Jay, are you sure you want to share?"

 "Ohhhhh, yeah," Jay said confidently, reaching out and clasping Chris' shoulder, smiling at the unsure blonde reassuringly. "So are you in?"

 Chris glanced at Adam, running his eyes over the taller man's bare legs, up to where the soft white robe covered Adam's thighs. The skimpy garment suddenly seemed much more appealing. "I'm in," Chris decided.

 Jay smiled. "Good. Well, first thing, I think you might want to lose the robe." The golden blonde reached out and undid the ties on Chris' only piece of clothing, sliding it back off his shoulders with a sensual caress. Chris sighed from the soft touches. "I get to warm him up," Jay told Adam, who was watching with interest. He slid his hands down Chris's back, his fingers coming to rest gently on Chris' firm bottom. He pulled gently, sliding Chris onto his back. He crouched beside the shorter man on his hands and knees.

 "Are you excited, baby?" Jay whispered right into Chris' ear, trailing his hand tauntingly down the blonde's stomach.

 "Um, yes," Chris replied, with a sharp intake of breath as Jay ran his hand up his sensitive thigh.

 "Good." Jay leaned in to meet Chris' lips, his hand lingering on the blonde's inner thigh.

 Chris' heart was beating quickly with excitement. He propped himself up on his elbow, watching was Jay slid up the bed and motioned to Adam. The tall blonde crawled toward him, grinning wickedly. Chris let Adam push him onto his back, his lips connecting with his fellow Canadian's. They were sprawled across the foot of the bed, Jay watching attentively from a few feet away. "Come on Adam," Jay urged as Adam covered Chris' face with kisses. "I wanna see you fuck him! Fuck him like he was me." The golden blonde was delighted by the shivers of excitement running through his body. For the first time in years, he was excited about sex, and he wasn't even the one getting laid.

 It didn't take long for Adam to shed his own robe. Once he was naked, he descended on Chris like a predator, kissing, licking and nipping all over his body. Chris began to moan, running his hands all over Adam's body in return. After a moment's consideration, Jay stripped off his robe as well. His hands ran down his own chest, though he remained a few feet away from the other two, watching, his fingers plucking at his own nipples. He was more turned on than he could believe. The sight of his lover crawling all over another man was the sexiest thing he had ever seen.

 Jay's movements weren't lost on Adam. His eyes hungrily took in the sight of the golden blonde touching himself. He felt about to explode from need. His green eyes turned back to the man beneath him. He quickly wet two fingers, then gently inserted them into Chris. He thrust them in a gentle rhythm, stretching Chris wide for his entrance.

 "Ooh, Adam!" Chris cried, arching into Adam's thrusting fingers. "Oh god, that's good! Adam, more! I - I want you inside me, now!"

 Adam grinned, pulling his fingers out and positioning himself at Chris' opening. Chris spread his legs wide, panting already. His eyes were gleaming with excitement. He let out a strangled gasp as Adam penetrated him, slowly inching his way inside until he was buried up to the hilt.The tall blonde paused to let Chris adjust to him. He leaned down and wrapped his arms around Chris' back, pulling their chests tightly together. Chris wrapped his arms around Adam, his legs circling about Adam's hips.

 "Fuck him," Jay growled commandingly. Adam pressed his lips to Chris'. They shared a heated kiss as Adam began to thrust his hips. It wasn't long before Chris was writhing beneath him, arching frantically into his thrusts and screaming out incoherently.

 Jay watched with fascination as they heaved against each other. His eyes were focused on the sight of his lover's thick member sliding in and out of Chris' tight ass. Groaning, he let his hand travel down his stomach, beginning to stroke his erect cock. He soon brought his other hand to help as Adam drove himself into Chris again and again. After what could've been hours, Adam's body tensed, and he came with a loud shout. Chris' eyes widened as hot come shot into his body. He cried out as he shot into his orgasm, thrashing wildly beneath Adam.

 They both lay still for a moment, their breathing ragged and labored. Chris still had his legs wrapped around Adam's waist, Adam's member buried deep inside him. Jay had stopped stroking himself, floored by the intensity of both their orgasms. Chris was the first to speak, with a slight whimper. "Again," he begged, arching his hips wantingly, making sure Adam stayed inside. "Please." Adam and Jay looked at eachother, botth nodding simultaniously.

 Chris grinned. In a swift movement, he rolled Adam onto his back, straddling his hips and placing his hands on the tall blonde's muscular chest for support. "I wanna ride you this time," he panted huskily. His eyes were glazed over with lust, a look which perfectly mirrored the other two pairs of eyes in the room.

 "Yeah baby. Ride m - OH!" Adam cried as Chris raised himself up and slammed down. The tall blonde could do nothing but scream out nonsensical words as Chris bounced on him, the pace hard and fast. Chris threw his head back in pleasure, moaning uncontrolably.

 "Baby, yes! Fill me; yes, you fill me so completely! Oh Adam!" Chris panted. Jay had begun stroking himself again, his eyes fixed upon Adam's member filling Chris. "Jay," Chris gasped, motioned for the golden blonde to come closer. Jay did, not stopping his stroking for a moment. "Let me do that for you," Chris panted, bending over and quickly taking Jay's cock in his mouth. He continued to bounce on Adam as he deep throated Jay, making the golden blonde scream with pleasure. All in the same instant, they came. A bright white light flashed in front of Jay's eyes as indescribable pleasure coursed through his body like an explosion. He collapsed onto the bed, completely exhaughsted.

 "Oh Chris - thank you," Jay choked out. He hadn't been expecting to get anything like that.

 "My pleasure," Chris returned. He had rolled off of Adam and onto his back, lying between the other two panting blondes. All three lay in silence for a bit, letting their breathing return to normal.

 Then, a loud knock came on the door. Chris groaned, but stood up anyway. "I'll get it," he grumbled, quickly pulling on a robe. He opened the door, blinking in shock when he saw who it was. Jeff was standing in the hall, looking furious. The Hardy grabbed Chris' arm and yanked him into the hall.

 "Chris, what the fuck was that?!?" Jeff screamed. "I was worried when you didn't show up at our room, so I came to find you! And I hear you fucking Adam!!!! I am your god damn boyfriend, how could you do this to me?!?" Jeff's face was red with fury, his fists clenched at his sides.

 "Me?" Chris scowled, starting to get angry himself. "You're the bastard! Jay told us how you begged him to give you a quick fuck, on your bike no less! So don't you bitch to me about betraying YOU, you dumb bitch!"

 Jeff's eyes had widened, and he looked considerably shocked. "The bitch is lying!" he excliamed. "Chris, baby, you're gonna believe that bitch over your own boyfriend?"

 Chris glared angrily at his lover. "Why didn't you give him a ride back to the hotel, then?" he challanged. Jeff grasped for an explanation, but Chris didn't give him time to answer. "You make me sick, Jeff," he spat as he yanked the room door open. "It's over!" With that, he stomped into the room and slammed the door, leaving a stunned Jeff staring after him.


- Three Months Later -

 Jay yawned as he returned to consciousness. He opened his eyes, smiling lazily as he watched beams of sunlight dance across the ceiling. The past three months had been the happiest of his life. He still had to deal with the guys in the locker room, but he had enough love and support behind him to help him cope. Jay turned on his side, gazing at the beautiful blonde sleeping beside him. He ran a finger gently down Chris' cheek. "Baby, wake up," he whispered in Chris' ear.

 Chris stirred. He smiled as he opened his big blue eyes and met Jay's gaze. "Morning, darling," he breathed. He glanced over at the clock and chuckled. "Man, we must've really tired ourselves out last night to have slept in this late," he commented.

 Jay grinned and nodded. Over the past few months, he had fallen deeply in love with Chris. There was no sweeter feeling than to wake up next to him. A stirring noise from Jay's other side drew his attention to the third person in the bed. "Mmm, man was last night fun," Adam stated, propping himself up on his elbows.

 "No argument here." Jay leaned in to capture Adam' lips in a passionate kiss. The memory of the previous night, when the three of them had made love until the early hours of the morning, was still fresh in his mind. It was taking some time, but he was slowly healing. He had rediscovered the joys of sex, as well as the wonder of love. He didn't know how it was possible to be completely in love with two people at the same time, but he was. He loved both Adam and Chris with all his heart. Fortunately, they had no problem with that. They loved each other too, Jay guessed just as strongly as he loved them.

 Jay wrapped his arms around his lovers, pulling them in close to him. "I love you guys," he told them. "You saved me." Adam and Chris grinned, each replying with a kiss to his cheek, then to each other's lips. This brought a smile to his face, but no more words were spoken. Jay was content to do nothing more than hold the men he loved.

 THE END
 

Feed the Author
 

Back to Fanfic

To E&C Fic

Message Board

Home